[my government to-do's]
[counting and 2 years]
[when Genesis Toledo = Carlo Sayco]
[my blogging legacy]
[i thought i was gonna die... again]
[unlimited sarcasm]
[think still]
[best of 2006]
[wishes the wishes]
[the notion to seduce]
[nineteen and younger please]
[agh, love]
[mixed feelings]
[someone wants me dead]
[frustrated career [part three]]
[10 simple pleasures]
[ikaw ang nasa isip ko]
[muling pagbangon ni _kErwin_]
[Da Vinci's bigger picture]
[counterphobia]
[frustrated career [part two]]
[frustrated career [part one]]
[sine silip ko lang]
[Abes getaway - complete saga]
[i'm only pulling myself]
[TM - Torpeng Martir]
[how kErwin is weird?]
[flicks of weeks]
[strictly formal on love]
[minding everything]
[redefined and hunted down]
[rise of the rockstar]
[life: busy, social, lively]
[c'mon and dare talk]
[the code to nowhere]
[somebody save me]
[the commuter's pride]
[dancing in the afternoon]
[legal announcement]
[where do i go from here?]
[Abeas the beast]
[consequences of hardwork]
[too early to say goodbye]
[it's MAI botdey!!]
[superhero bonanza]
["geek geek geek," ang sabi ng geek]
[kids, fun, learning and memories]
[i stayed, frustrated]
[the devil within]
[meant to be...]
[they saw the changes]
[suffering from the unseen]
[busy and dead]
[the child at heart]
[one lovely Rose]
[delayed]
[don't get me wrong, ma'am]
[for deary dear]
[the tongue - cute]
[sleepless over and over]
[kErwin is satanic!?]
[Carlo interviewed]
[the challenge: not extra, not less]
[another door... and so it opens]
[not enough: F4, joyridE, 700 and frustrations]
[tea, popcorn and pizza blues]
[leave it behind]
[love story: despite the odds]
[Carrie and the bone marrow]
[as i have seen: the JC-NEB 2k5 Family]
[silent hill: ang kuta sa Tandang Sora, QC]
[in search for Paciano]
[my present lies... my future puzzled]
[lucky day... for real!!!]
[everybody hurts - R.E.M.]
["...it's about time!"]
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Friday, May 26, 2006
counterphobia. i believe this one's rare; it's the fear from thoughts of danger. one is not afraid to face a particular thing, but imagining an unlikely scenario is already a stab in the heart. this one's too complicated to handle.
every fear is in the mind. just believe in yourself and trust the right people and everything would turn out right. no more traumas and excessive sweating to bother with.
it's what i'm dealing with. and not even my nerdiest-mode brain could not bear with it. the instinct of staying safe and alive dominates and the heart ceases. at least, it would be over for some moment and then would return repeatedly.
stay safe, stay alive.
i'm not afraid of being stranded in a foreign place. but the insecurities, thoughts of hold-up, gang attacks, and other social misdeeds. i'm not afraid of being alone. but whenever i imagine the people i know of forgetting about me chokes me.
i'm not afraid of the nature, in fact, i love it. but getting drowned in the water, burned by the fire, or choked by the sand...
someone might push me off the edge... i might cut myself... i could stumble and break my leg... i might slip and be an embarrassment icon... i might get infected with diseases... i might die.
i'm not afraid of fights, but i'm scared of losing friends. i'm even more afraid to wholely trust somebody because i know that person will not always be there for me. and it kills me to hear from another person backstabbing.
counterphobia is not only about the war of the mind. it's about me... and deal with it.
BLOGPSPOT: Your Constancy
LIVEJOURNAL: Should Stop Here
TABULAS: A Concerned Letter for Me
MULTIPLY: "Do I Make You Proud?" Lyrics
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